Life's Snapshots #20.

 A throw back Thursday from my birthday back in August that I never posted.

Obviously had quite a good first visit at Ulta yesterday...

Found these flowers on the sidewalk when walking to Starbucks. God was looking out for me :)

 

 Rainy days are literally the best (and we have lots of them here).

Finished up this little ditty the other day and it was good, just not what I expected.

 

 The famous cookie place that delivers warm treats to your dorm in the middle of the night. This is love at first sight.

 

 This is exactly why I love my school; and if you don't get this reference you can leave right now (shame on you).

 

My lipstick brings all the boys to the yard (again, if you don't get this reference, take yourself back to 2005 and discover it. Now).

Forever locking myself out of my dorm. Sigh.

There's something for everyone at Kent State, LOLZ.

 

 The prettiest stationary I ever did see; and buy.

 

The apple orchard is one magical place.

 

My first cake pop was surely a success!

 

 I was feeling sad one night so I compensated by buying myself a lot of chocolate. This is very justifiable.

 

Very obviously I have the cutest (and nosiest) mother ever.

Supporting a day very near and dear to my heart ♥

  

 My little sister donated 10 inches of her hair to Locks of Love! So insanely proud of her.

 

 Crazy 4 pumpkin flavored anything.

Life is incredibly, crazily, beautiful; isn't it?

Follow my life and all its beauty on instagram with @passingwhimsies

With much love, Lauren.

Sometimes Love Is Not Enough.

Pewter Rose Jacquard Dress: c/o Eshakti 

Grey Dress (worn underneath): Modcloth.

Cameo Necklace: Gift from my grandmother.

Spiked Heels: TJ Maxx.

I left all my pretty/fancy dresses at home which has really been bumming me out lately. I'm craving to dress super retro and feminine but none of the dresses I packed are much of those characteristics. So, thrilled was I when I received this Eshakti dress in the mail. Eeee, it screams retro 60's perfection! I did a bit of a beehive bump with my hair and more eyeliner for that 1960's look. I've been listening to Lana Del Rey so much lately (hence the title of this post) that it's no wonder I'm head over heels for that period right now!

This dress is made of a sturdy jacquard material that I found was structural but still moved well. It made twirling for these pictures quite fun, heh. And of course, a selling point for me is any dress that has pockets. Literally the perfect dress that I'm so blessed to have in my closet♥

I have a fairly exciting weekend ahead of me. Tomorrow morning I'm going thrift shopping with Jessica, and then in the afternoon my parents, sister, and grandmother are coming up to Kent to spend the day! On Sunday I'm going to see Perks of Being a Wallflower with Erin, and then by that time the weekend will be over. Hope it's a swell one :)

Have a lovely weekend you gals!

With much love, Lauren.

10 Things.

What I love about Kent:

1. Hearing the trains. It's such a simple pleasure but one that puts me over the moon. When I lay in bed at night, I can hear the mesmerizing sound of the train coming through town and it puts me into the perfect mood for sleeping. I love to think I'm a maiden from the days past, catching a train to meet my husband returning from war. A gal can dream, can't she?

2. The campus. I go to school at the most picturesque place. Greenery everywhere and brick laid walk ways as far as the eye can see. The trees are starting to change color which makes things even more romantic. Even more nostalgic. Sometimes walking back from my classes I just get so absorbed and overwhelmed by the beauty of this place and its atmosphere. Even on the most rainy, dreary days Kent is a beautiful Midwest college full of promise.

3. Independence. I love feeling independent. I love taking care of myself, being on my own schedule, and frankly...doing what I want when I want. Being in charge of your life and the direction you're going is a powerful feeling that is often times scary, but so rewarding, as well. I've learned so much in this month of taking care of myself than I have in years of living at home.

4. Fitting in. In my home town, I felt out of place. Weird. Different. Obscure. I've never felt more at home and with like minded people here though. I'm no longer 'the weird girl.' I'm actually considered very normal in the scheme of things here! It's good to be able to be surrounded with people who just get me and how I think and how I dress. I never thought these people existed.

5.The coffee shops. Sounds silly, doesn't it? I'll let you all in on a little secret. When I toured colleges in high school I of course looked for the basic things everyone does; good program for what I'm studying, liveable campus, not too far from home, the community surrounding it, ect. But the one thing that was a selling point for me was the coffee shops. They had to have lots and they had to...feel right. And that's exactly what they are here at Kent. I have ( and I'm ashamed to admit) become quite addicted to caffeine and these coffee shops lately. I love to sit in their cozy comfort, smelling the beans and sipping on a hot drink, reading blogs. I love to people watch and imagine what their lives are like and what they've done to make them themselves. Someday I'll meet my husband at a coffee shop- I've always known that. Perhaps it will be one here.

6. Fashion Fundamentals. It's a class of mine that I wish was longer than 50 minutes, three times a week. I could sit there for hours, absorbing information and becoming inspired and filled with knowledge. This class has helped me realize without any doubts that I'm right where I should be and studying everything I should be. I couldn't be happier.

7. People are friendly. Like, really, really friendly. It always shocks me so much because in my home town it was never like that. I was never used to people smiling at me or saying hello, coming up to talk to me just because. It's so wonderful because I am hopelessly shy (especially when it comes to new people) and the fact that people take notice of me and want to get to know me blows my mind. That's actually how I met my friend, Erin. She just came up to me, introduced herself, and that was that. I wish everything could be that easy.

8. Downtown. It's filled with the most perfect shops. A cookie delivery that brings you warm cookies (and milk!) until 3 AM. Cutsey clothing stores, delicious eateries, a new frozen yogurt place, and even a store that sells magic wands. Come on, your college doesn't have that...And the best part? It's all within walking distance.

9. Organizations. They actually mean something here. You don't just join them so that 'it looks good on a college app.' The clubs I was in during high school were lame. I'm sorry, they just were. They were never involved, never passionate, and hardly anyone ever came. But here...there's a club for everything and everyone. I love going to TWLOHA, NAVS, and The Fashion Student Organization. They are all things I'm so excited about and the people there are just excited as me. It makes the world of difference and I'm excited to discover even more. Did I mention that there's even an evil geniuses club on campus? Yep, something for everyone.

10. The person I am at Kent. I've always been pretty sure of who I am and what I stand for. I've known with confidence since the 8th grade and haven't wavered much since. I didn't think that coming to college would change much--that it would be easy to stay who I've been (and been happy with being). But it's not as easy as I thought it would be. I've been tested- many times to either be the person I am, or the person I am not. I've noticed though just how much I've grown and changed and gotten stronger in a month of going to college. I still have all of my same morals, ideals, and self but I've only become stronger in all of that. It's not to say I haven't been tested. About 75% of people on this campus smoke and even though I HATE smoking, because everyone is doing it and because 'my type of people' smoke it gives me the urge to try it, too. I know how stupid that sounds and I know I would hate it and I get so angry at myself that I would even consider it. But at the end of the day, I'm still myself and through all of the transitional periods and challenging situations I've been faced with here I've stayed true to Lauren and been proud to be someone like me here. 

I try to think about this list of 10 things and many more whenever I'm having a bad day or a bad experience. I try to be thankful for all of what I have here because I and my parents have truly sacrificed so much and I am just so thankful to be here at Kent. I'm living out my dreams, my dream life, and being my dream self. Life is pretty beautiful when you get to do all that at just 19 ♥

With much love, Lauren.

Moody Wednesday.

Peter Pan Collar Shirt: Forever21.

Spotted Skirt: Thrifted.

Red Beret: Target.

Black Bow Flats: JcPenny's.

Red Bow Belt: c/o OASAP.

Hello.

I'm tired, not feeling well, and grouchy tonight. I really need to start going to bed before two. That and eating more. I'm off to worship service for tonight though which I always look forward to. Hopefully it will liven my spirit ♥ (edit: just got back from NAVS; feeling much better).

President Obama visited Kent today. The lines to get in were crazy long; wrapping around the entire campus. It rained all day (which I don't mind) but I'm sure the people standing outside since 10 this morning until 5 this evening did. Poor souls. I do wish I would have gotten tickets to see him though. Any way you look at it he is the president and hearing him speak live is an experience you'll never forget. I would have had to miss classes though which I am wholly set against; I'll be half dead before I ever miss a class. 

Hope you all are well; sorry I'm so moody and dull tonight.

With much love, Lauren.

Sad To See You Go.

Checkard Dress, Black Booties: Thrifted.

Tan Trench: Kohl's.

Black Knit Infinity Scarf: Target.

Camel Beret: American Apparel.

I believe the worst thing in life is when people change. It gets me every time; never getting easier as I go through life. I'm consistently nostalgic for the past and with the past there comes the past people from my life. I think about what they were like, how they made me feel, who I was with them, and how they were there for me. I think about the good times, yes, but I don't forget to reflect on that bad. But the bad don't matter when you love a person so much it hurts; when you would do anything in the world to never hurt them.

But people change. And they grow older and selfish and cold. They forget who they were and they can't see from the inside looking out the callousness that they develop. I don't know why people change. I know scientifically it has to do with environment and experiences, chemicals and hormones. But at the end of the day, with all of the scientific reasoning and methods I still have the same question; why do people change?

Why do they change and take the hearts of those who love them along for the ride? Dragging the heart in the mud, scarring it, tearing it apart on the journey. People don't forget who you were; they stay with that person. Sometimes forever. And I just don't know why for the love of God it's necessary for people to change and do this to those who love them because it's the most painful thing in the world.

I want to forget. I want to heal. But my love for a person in my past is so insurmountable, so overpowering that I can't let go. I know that the only way to move on is to accept that a person has changed. It's almost like experiencing a death. You have to realize they're gone forever, cope with mourning, and try to find a way to get through with that empty hole in your life.

I want to fill the hole up with so many things. I'd like to starve myself to feel control and cut myself to feel alive and date someone I don't care about just to feel loved and lay in my bed all day crying until every ounce of water is drained out of my body...but I know none of that will help fill that void I have for the person who isn't here anymore. Those things never will and thankfully, I realize that.

I'm always praying, always writing. Always.

With much love, Lauren.

Peek Inside My Dorm!

I'm a little slow getting around to it, but here's a peek into my dorm room! I've made it literally my dream space to live in that I couldn't ask for anything else. Feminine, organized, romantic, and well....dreamy! I have the top bunk and I have Christmas lights strung around the bed post so I can write in my journal at night while Audrey looks down from above. On the other wall by my bed I have my motto for the year 'dream' in word cut outs with stick on clouds and glow in the dark stars going up to the ceiling. I love to look at them when I pray at night. My bed is super comfy- more so than the one I have at home!

I have all of my dresses and such hung up in my closet with my heels displayed down below. In drawers I have my pants/skirts and in the drawer below that I keep all of my flats. My desk area is the perfect place for inspiration yet getting work done and I love having a bulletin board above to pin my favorite magazine clippings and words that I keep close to my heart. 

I keep all my jewelry on a cute tree sitting atop my dresser and have all of my perfumes, trinkets, and sentimental items sitting there, too. My makeup is organized in the drawers of the storage unit; all by type of product (lipsticks forever being my favorite drawer). The first week of school I bought a movie posters of The Notebook and the famous World War II kiss to adorn my walls. 

My hamper looks like a washer which is pretty much the most adorable thing ever, and I keep all of my food (aka junk food) atop a shelving cubical which organizes my towels and such. I had to be weird and color coordinate them all!

To be honest I don't miss my home. I miss the people at home (my family and kitty cat), but not the actual place. It brings me too much sadness and I end up crying too much when I go home. Memories haunt the place and unexpected momentous that I haven't gotten rid of are always popping up all over the place. I wish I had a metal detector to collect them all at once so I never have to have the pain brought up. But then again, it's not just items that remind me; it's everything. And you certainty can't get rid of everything.

With much love, Lauren.