Cream Dress: H&M.
Green Army Jacket, Necklace: Thrifted.
Wide Brimmed Hat: Brandy Melville.
Faux Fur Lined Leggings: c/o OASAP.
Brown Boots: c/o Pink and Pepper.
Lipstick in MAC's Craving.
Hello ♥
College years are scary. What I've started becoming aware of since coming back to Kent State this semester is just how soon my time here is ending. I really don't have much longer left. This sort of thing raises questions of where I'll be living after I graduate, what my job will be, who I'll be with... Most people wouldn't worry about these sort of things yet because they're a year and a half away and it's silly to worry about something that much into the future. But since an internship is required for me this summer for my fashion program, it seems like I'll be going through a little trial experiment of what it'll actually be like to graduate.
I'm just really scared. I'm applying to all these places all across the country, with no idea who will hire me, what city I'll be in... it terrifies me to think about how soon all of this is happening and that this is the reality of my life. Most majors can just stay in the same state they live/go to college in because there are jobs readily available. With fashion...it doesn't usually work like that. You have to live in the bigger cities, away from home and what's familiar. It's not really a choice; it's what you do in order to get a job.
And I really can't complain. I can't moan and groan and act like I have it so badly because I chose this. It was my decision to go this career field; it was my decision to make my life uncomfortable when it comes to job stability and location. You think about these things when you first go into the major and kind of tell yourself all along that you'll have to prepare yourself for it...but until it actually starts happening, there's just no way you can. It's kind of like Florence. I was so worried about surviving in a foreign country for four months but in the end, there was just nothing I could do to really prepare. I just had to go out, live it, and do it.
I'm sure it'll be the same way with finding an internship/job, as well, but the idea of it is just scary. I tire of never knowing the path of my life and how things are going to be. I suppose no one knows, really, but for someone like myself who likes to plan out every detail of their life and hope it goes that way...soon I'll realize through experience that life doesn't work that way.
Right now I'm just in the praying stages of things. Praying it all works out. Praying it's in God's hands. Praying I can have peace of mind. Praying and just doing the best I possibly can to try my hardest. That's all I can do.
With much love, Lauren.