a personal style blog by Lauren Pfieffer

Friday, April 5, 2013

Eight.

*This is a little something I wrote on April 3rd when I was feeling inspired late in the night *
  
As of today it has been 8 months. April 3rd. Eight very trying, heartbreaking, and painful months. But I wouldn't take a second of any of it back because all of it brought me to a new, beautiful life. A life with Christ that is beyond what I could ever imagine. In my darkest days, the worst of my suffering I wanted something more for my life. I knew that there had to be a better way of living than I was. Someone who would be there for me no matter what and love me flaws and all and there was. There is. I didn't set out to college at becoming a Christian. I had absolutely no intention, no desire. I was just fine, went to church, did all the right things. But I wasn't there. I wasn't living and breathing and feeling it.

With it being 8 months as of today (look to August 3rd) I just look back at everything that's happened and how far I've come. It may have taken 8 months to be set free, but I finally am. And it is the most pure, beautiful, happiness I've ever felt. Tonight at NAVS I was so touched and in awe at how much my life has changed with one simple, "I accept You." I never thought happiness could come to someone like me but it did. 

When the band struck the opening chords of the next song in the dark, quiet room tonight at NAVS my heart did a little flip. I knew the song, I would never mistake it. The night I came to Christ last October they played it at the fall conference. I remember sitting there, singing that song and just out of no where, sobbing. Literally, crying harder than I ever had in my life because I realized how broken I was and how I needed so much help. They played How He Loves By David Crowder and I got up, left the room and fell into the arms of a staff member and told them--" I want to accept Christ." So they played this song again tonight at NAVS and I sang it with all my heart for everything I've been through the past 8 months. It's so beautiful to see my growth and journey and I don't regret a single step of it. It was the most painful thing I've ever gone through, but it brought about the most beautiful thing to ever happen to me.

And we are His portion and He is our prize
Drawn to redemption by the grace in His eyes
If His grace is an ocean we're all sinking
Heaven meets the earth like an unforseen kiss
And my heart turns violently inside of my chest
I don't have time to maintain these regrets when I think about
The way...

He loves us.

With much love, Lauren.
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8 comments

Anonymous said...

This is beautiful, Lauren. I really enjoyed reading your testimony. It reminded me of my own coming to Christ nearly 6 years ago. So glad to have you as a sister in Christ!

Love, Amy
A. Loo's Closet

Unknown said...

So awesome for you to share this! It's great to see how Navs has touched you :) I know it was great for my to find Christian fellowship at Akron! I'll be praying for you!

http://findingmyinspiration.blogspot.com/

Jeannee said...

Lauren, you never cease to amaze and inspire me!!! - from quoting Scripture to finding a bargain-shopping w/ Mom (how blessed u r!!!)!!! I just hope & pray that you will find the right place to work for BOTH your soul & your pocketbook, and that they know what a terrific young lady they r hiring :) How wonderful it is that your entire future is stretched out in front of you, & you're not letting depression steal that away - hurrah!!!

Elanor said...

This post makes me so happy and simply warms me from head to toe. I'm SO happy for you and for how the Holy Spirit has come alive in you and how visible it is that God is working in your life. <3

Praise the Lord!
xxoo Elanor

Maja said...

This is so beautiful, I am so happy for you.
He is truly amazing!

Kezzie said...

Hello Lauren! This post gladdens my heart! I am happy that you are in this place! Long may you continue to grow. it wont always be easy but it will be easier than it would have been without Christ!
x

John Mark McMillan said...

"Sloppy wet kiss"*

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