a personal style blog by Lauren Pfieffer

Monday, August 10, 2015

New York Changed My Life.

Flower Halter Top: Aeropostale.
Red Denim Shorts, Earrings: Thrifted.
White Flats: Forever21.

HELLO

In the nearly six years I've been blogging I have never taken so long of a break--nearly a month--without posting. It was not planned, but I think it was something I needed. I've blogged through many challenging points of my life and relied on my blog as an outlet. But when I was in New York City (I just got back today) I enjoyed my life first hand instead of blogging about it. And that felt nice to do. For the first time I wanted to soak up every second of what I was in instead of loosing that time trying to document it. Blogging is important to me. It will always be. Sometimes, however, it can't take precedence over my actual life when I need to be living it most. 

It always seemed like I was changing too fast in New York to even document. Every single day I became a new person because I was constantly exposed to new things. It was an amazing feeling. Every day was a building block to making me stronger, wiser, and more in tune with who I am. It's strange because at every big turning point in my life, whether it be graduating high school, coming to college, studying abroad, going through a break ups, ect...I think to myself, "this is me, I cannot reach a more deeper level of myself." Every time I'm proved wrong. I've realized there's lots of versions of myself and there will always be more. That's what life is. Becoming better and stronger versions of ourselves. New York made me feel like the best version of myself I've ever been. I felt finally my inward soul become part of my outward; and others could see it.

I've gone much of my life feeling like people didn't get me. I try to help them understand me, but there's always this wall I can't get past. I've tried jumping it. I've tried climbing it. I've tried tearing it down. But all of these things only led to deeper frustration within myself. I couldn't make them really understand who I was, no matter how hard I tried. In New York though, it was just so strange...and unexpected. But the real me showed through. I don't really know how it happened. Maybe the rawness of New York brought out the rawness in myself.  It was just so freeing to show the people I met in New York City the real me and even more so to be accepted. It's something I never really thought could happen.

I have so much to write about. I feel like I'm overflowing with stories and experiences to share with you all. New York truly changed my life. Completely. I miss it so much already but know after having had my life touched so deeply by it this summer, it will not be the last time I am there. x

Missed you all to the moon and back,truly. Can't wait to get back to regular posting. Love you. 

With much love, Lauren.
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6 comments

Alona said...

Your writing is always so beautiful!
I completely get you when you say that you've been trying to get people to understand you, but they just don't.
Can't wait to read about your experiences in NY :)
x Alona

gentleconfusion.blogspot.com

Kezzie said...

I'm glad it was a powerful experience for you and you've gone through something great.

Carmel Elizabeth said...

I'm so happy & excited for you, and I cannot wait to hear more about this adventure. ^.^

"We travel, not to better know the world, but to better know ourselves."

Jenna Leigh said...

New York seems like such an amazing place! I would love to visit one day, everything about it just seems so life changes! So happy for you Lauren

http://abeautifulheart07.blogspot.com/

Brenda said...

Hi Lauren firstly, I love your blog! Your blog always makes me feel like it's ok to be me.
I can totally relate to how you are feeling now and I'm so happy for you that you feel like you are growing and people are accepting you for who you are. I'm actually experiencing something like that right now and I can't thank God enough for all these rich experiences. For making my life feel more fulfilling.
Pls continue to cherish every moment in NY and god bless! :)

Mary said...

Same exact thing with me! Always felt like no one *got* me, but in NYC I finally found my people! People who get me! It's amazing. I'm so glad you were able to experience it, Lauren, and I hope you get to come back after you graduate!

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