a personal style blog by Lauren Pfieffer

Friday, November 30, 2012


Blue Dress: Modcloth.
Red Trench, Blue Beret: Forever21.
Black Boots: Thrifted.

Lately I've been stumped about what to write when I put together blog posts. I sit here, staring at my computer screen, racking my brain through the day's memories, trying to find something interesting to tell you all. Something, anything. I used to be able to write exactly every feeling and thought I felt so easily. I blogged through my loneliness, my OCD, my depression, my broken friendships, my break up. So after all this I have no clue what to write about because...

I'm finally happy. It's that weird place where I never thought I'd be. Never suspected I'd end up. I am completely and utterly in love with life. My life. I don't think I've ever really written about 'happy things' on this blog. If I have, they've just been little posts about misicsule life happenings. I can't remember a single one of my posts where I wrote about something happy; none stick out in my mind.

I feel strange writing about happy things. I don't know how to take them and it sounds so silly but it is completely and honestly true. I had accepted a long time ago that I would just always be this bitter, angsty, lonely girl in life who was constantly searching for something more. 

Writing about frivolous and light things just seems so empty compared to what I used to write about but those old topics just seem beaten into the ground. I've relived these moments of my life the past few years a thousand times as my fingers furiously type across the key pad, tears cascade from my eyes, heart with a painful, dull, sinking feeling. Hitting publish. Looking back. Reading a moment in time I felt and hurt and was real.

But with as strong as the feelings of sadness the feelings of happiness are just as strong, if not stronger. A true happiness that exudes from your soul. Even if the day is bad, even if everything goes wrong I can't help but to smile and still have this strange sense of inner contentment that keeps me going. This.This is what I've been searching for, guys...and I think I'm at such a loss of words, such an inability to write what I feel because it's like any feeling I've ever felt before.

I laugh until my cheeks hurt and tears stream from my eyes. I smile up into the sky even on the most cloudy days. I hug my friends and wipe away their tears, cherishing every moment with them. I drink the best cups of coffee and relish in the feeling of pure satisfaction. I call my parents, excited and smiling, telling them about my day. I fall asleep at night, stumbling over my words to say to God to say how thankful I am. I go to concerts, stay up until four in the morning, be accepted for who I am, eat all the junk food I want, talk to my 'dream' type of guys, study what I love every day, and read the bible, getting chills

This is life. My life. And I don't want to write about sad things anymore. I want to write about what makes me happy.

With much love, Lauren.

P.S. Isn't my necklace a total and utter beaut? I can't even get over how perfect and whimsical it is. Gahh, can't get enough of Katie Dean's jewelry. It makes me so excited to see a designer start a business from the ground up because as a fashion student currently, I know how hard it is! Check out her other beautiful pieces if you'd fancy


Carlee, Little Sloth said...

I am glad your happy and content with life right now! it is so good to here you say that and be happy with the place you are at. Yay! I love your outfit. And I also really like the background of these photos.
Almost Endearing

Unknown said...

So happy that you are happy!

Greta said...

I love this. So much. I'm so glad you're happy, you truly truly deserve it. You prove that happiness is beautiful! (okaaay beyond cheesy, I can admit it)

Greta xoxo

Jeannee said...

Wow! Praise God! I look forward to many more happy posts - but - that said - even if happy temporarily leaves - I know I can always, always, look forward to fashion AND honest writing: what a great combo!!!

Britney @ Scout and Company said...

Congratulations Lauren :) I am so so happy for you!

Anonymous said...

So pretty as usual! I love all of the little details. :)It's so hard to get over bitterness, and I have only been reading your blog for a month and don't know what you've gone through, but I'm glad that you're happy now!


Unknown said...

I am SO happy to see YOU happy Lauren! You've always been one of my favorite bloggers and I am just so glad to see such wonderful things happening in your life. :-)

PS the wishbone necklace is adorable!!

Kristian said...

So glad you are happy (and even if it doesn't "feel as deep" I hope you continue to write about. Sending positivity into the world never hurts!

You look darling and remind me just a bit of that children's book favorite Madeline!

friedenlinde said...

lovely Lauren, I am so happy to hear about your feelings. See, even after the bitter, the sun will shine again. This is a very special time in life, so enjoy it. College years, expecially if you are studying something you really like, are truly a blessing!

friedenlinde said...

...of course I forgot to mention these pics and your outfit! Both so pretty! lovely little french Lauren :)

Megan Butcher said...

Lovely shots! Great outfit :) And yes, that wish bone necklace is so pretty & unique! Thanks for sharing!


Charmaine said...

That last paragraph was pure, articulate gold. I am so happy for you, Lauren!

As an aside, I love the yellow background paired with your primary colour outfit, all those colours work so well together!

Keep on smiling :).

Unknown said...

So glad your finally happy!!!!!!
Love your outfit, really cute.

XX Audrey


Kezzie said...

If there's one thing that makes me happy is reading the words of a person made eloquent by the beauty of joy! I am delighted by how things are going for you, dear, sweet Lauren! God bless you x

Anonymous said...

This post makes me so, so, so happy:)

Unknown said...

Isn't it amazing how God can completely and utterly change our sadness and sorrow to joy? He's a God of miracles! Love this post. :)

Mademoiselle S. said...

You are always so pretty and ispiring! If you get a second, I'd love to hear your thoughts about my latest post :)

-Mademoiselle S.


R said...

You are a girl of beauty for the blue and red color! You are always so beautiful in those colors =)

I've changed blog. If you have the possibility, you're welcome to see the new blog of mine.
La dolce Vita!



Alice, Pretty Confused said...

I'm so happy that you are happy Lauren! And I love this outfit, the red and blue looks amazing together, very pretty xo

Teddi said...

how refreshing and delightful dear lauren! i'm thrilled for your joy. :)

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