a personal style blog by Lauren Pfieffer

Monday, December 7, 2015

I'll Be Home for Christmas.

Oversized Navy Cardigan (similar): Thrifted.
Gray Jegging Jeans (similar & on sale): Aeropostale.
Green Blouse (similar): Forever21.
Yellow Beanie (similar + only $5 :O ): c/o OASAP.
Elisa Flat: c/o Loly in the Sky. 
Plaid Scarf (super similar + only $20!): Store in Florence. 

Hello everyone! 

The holiday season is upon us!! These photos were taken back when I was home for Thanksgiving with my family and I'm already dreaming of being back there in just one week's time...♥ I won't be there for long though until I'm off to NYC for a few days as my Christmas present! I've been dreaming a little more than I should be with finals amongst me (I've gotta get this stuff done...) but I can't help it. It's been four months since I've been in my favorite city & my excitement can hardly be contained.

For me, this isn't just a frivolous trip to NYC either. I actually planned and desired to go a slightly more serious reason. 

When I lived in NYC, I knew it was where I wanted to end up after I graduated. Every day since I've left I've continued dreaming and working hard to get myself back...but sometimes when you dream and work so hard for something, you begin to wonder; is it really worth it? Meaning in a sense, could this place I fell in love with, what I spend all my time, effort, and money pursing really be it? Is this really what I want? Sometimes it's hard for me to remember if I love NYC really as much in my mind as it is in real life. Maybe I dreamt it all. Maybe my summer there was a type of strange Cinderella story and the 'real NYC' is just a slush hole of bitter cold, gray concreted, stone hearted people. It was never that to me in the beautiful summer days where I worked on the 38th floor of one of the most established publishing companies in the United States, stumbling amongst the city for my first time ever with bright eyes...but what if it is now?

I've got to be sure what I felt for NYC in my heart four months ago is what I still feel before I decide to only put in applications there and truly set my mind solely on moving there. I've got to see once and for all if this is real. And right. I'm a big believer that you can't put yourself half way into something. Either I plan to give everything I have to get back to NYC these next few months, or I won't even try at all. 

I want to use this trip for it to just be me and the city again, to explore it and who I am inside of it. I've never doubted it not to have been what I want...but I am a cautious creature, and sometimes my dreams just seem too incredible to be true. It never hurts to make sure right before you leap in feet first

With much love, Lauren. 


Madison said...

I have loved hearing about your journey and dreams with NYC Lauren. I hope that you find an answer when you travel back to NY, but I am confident in believing that the big dreams...the ones that seem to big to be true are sometimes the dreams that are bound to come true in the crazy plan of life. Good luck and blessings on everything that is in store:)

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Sampada said...

That's a good idea to give your dream place one last scope out, to make sure that it's the one! I have no doubt that your love for the city was and still is true though :)

Good luck with finals!!


Carmel Elizabeth said...

I can definitely see you living long-term in NYC. I hope you have a wonderful visit this Christmas and come back with renewed vigor to work towards that goal. <3

All the best on your finals! I should probably study for mine now, lol. XD

Isabella said...

I hope it's as good as you remember! I'm so happy for you! Are you going completely alone? :O that might be scary!


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